


I Know That You'll Love Me Even When I Lose My Head

by Crab_Lad



Series: Reverse au [2]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: 80's time period, Cuddling & Snuggling, F/M, Genderfluid Crowley (Good Omens), Hurt/Comfort, Requited Love, She/Her Pronouns for Crowley (Good Omens), i guess, i love my au so mcuh, my aesthetic for this fic is crowley's pjs and i think we're alone now playing in the background, reverse au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-26
Updated: 2019-08-26
Packaged: 2020-09-26 19:14:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20394760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crab_Lad/pseuds/Crab_Lad
Summary: “I know what I said about us. I still mean it, but for one night I just want to forget about Heaven and Hell. For one night I just want to be just… Azirfell and Crowley. Not Azirfell the demon and Crowley the angel,” he mumbled, threading their fingers together and giving Crowley’s hand a quick squeeze.Crowley wrapped her other arm around him, letting her hand rest in his hair. It was softer than it looked, and she always longed to touch those white curls. He settled down further into her hold, clutching tight. Whatever had happened, he needed her. The whole situation wasn’t fair, but she wasn’t going to turn him down.If it was even for a night, she would hold him close and let him rest.Hell wasn’t kind.





	I Know That You'll Love Me Even When I Lose My Head

**Author's Note:**

> ok so i really wanted to write this because i wanted to explore the precanon of the reverse au and there will be a lot more fics coming out taking place before or after the main fic
> 
> bonus points if you can guess the song the title is from ;)  
also uhhh crowley's outfit is this: https://goodalexomens.tumblr.com/post/187270224705/crowleys-outfit-for-my-recent-reverse-au-fic

Crowley had come to sleeping around the 14th century back when the Plague had ravaged most of Europe. It started as a way to cope with the pain and suffering around her. She had wanted to heal them, to help so badly but every time she requested she got shut down. ‘A test from the Almighty’ was the reasoning Gabriel and the other Archangels gave. But, over time sleeping had become a regular occurrence. 

One she was partaking in when an urgent knock dragged her out. Crowley rose with a groan, slipping her sheer pink robe on, letting it hang just under her shoulders and tied at her waist. Another knock came from the door. 

“One moment!” she called out with a hint of annoyance. She attempted smoothing down her wild curls but they weren’t cooperating. Instead, she snatched up a hair band and pulled them back into a messy bun. 

She turned on the light and slipped on her octagonal glasses before she opened the door. Azirfell pushed himself inside without much of a greeting which was highly unusual for the demon. Crowley shut the door behind her moving to the kitchen in her flat. It seemed like the kind of situation where the demon would need something warm to drink. Azirfell fluttered around her as he followed. The two were silent even as the kettle was on, just standing side by side against her kitchen counter. 

It wasn’t until they were both sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of tea in hand did Crowley speak up, “Are you alright?”

Azirfell tapped his glass a few times before taking a sip. “No, I’m afraid.”

It was an unspoken rule between the two that there were no lies. Even if Azirfell was a demon, he had promised never to lie to her. In exchange she had secretly sworn that she wouldn’t lie either. (and, dear readers, this includes everything. They had never broken this promise.)

“Do you want to talk about it?” 

It was a gentle offer, an opening. A way for Azirfell to open up, but also a chance for him to refuse if he didn’t want to.

“No, dear, sorry. I’m afraid you’ll do something rash and get yourself killed. Demons are not as merciful as you angels.” 

“But-”

“No.” 

“Alright, sorry.” 

The two dropped into silence. As much as Crowley wanted to fix whatever was going on she knew she couldn’t. There was probably nothing she could do. It saddened her, and she longed to help.

From her side there was a clink, the sound of a chair scraping, and some shuffling. Then, Azirfell took one of her hands off her cup and into his own. Shocked, she whipped up causing her glasses to slide to the bridge of her nose. Crowley shot him a questioning look, but he just gestured with his head to the couch. Nodding, she placed her angel wing mug on the table and left to follow him to the couch. 

She sat down on the edge thinking he was just going to sit next to him, but instead, he laid down with his forehead resting against her shoulder. 

“But I thought you said-”

“I know what I said about us. I still mean it, but for one night I just want to forget about Heaven and Hell. For one night I just want to be just… Azirfell and Crowley. Not Azirfell the demon and Crowley the angel,” he mumbled, threading their fingers together and giving Crowley’s hand a quick squeeze. 

Crowley wrapped her other arm around him, letting her hand rest in his hair. It was softer than it looked, and she always longed to touch those white curls. He settled down further into her hold, clutching tight. Whatever had happened, he needed her. The whole situation wasn’t fair, but she wasn’t going to turn him down. 

If it was even for a night, she would hold him close and let him rest. 

Hell wasn’t kind. 

\--

They, or well she woke the next morning alone on the couch. Her glasses had been removed at some point, placed down on the table next to her. Crowley sat up, stretching, letting the robe fall down onto the couch. From the other room came the smell of bacon and eggs. 

“Good morning,” Azirfell’s warm voice from the doorway.

Crowley turned and gave him a sly smile, “Is that coffee you’re holding? I didn’t think you liked it.” 

“I don’t,” he responded, stepping further into the room. He placed the coffee on the table next to her, taking a seat at the chair to her right. “I know you do. I also made breakfast. I know you don’t eat but I am still hoping you would join me, my dear.”

She snatched up the coffee, but lead the way back into the kitchen. With a quick snap, she neatened the bun out into a ponytail and with another, started the stereo. 

It was a quite breakfast, but a peaceful one. It just left a strong longing in her to wake up every day like this, with her demon by her side. 

Finished, Azirfell placed his utensils down, and cleared his throat. 

  
“I wanted to apologize for my actions last night. I know we decided it would be best if we didn’t indulge in anything more than a friendship… but I-”

She waved her hand, cutting him off, “It’s alright, mouse. As far as I am concerned last night was between two friends.”

Azirfell was acting like they kissed. It wasn’t uncommon for friends to cuddle. Yes, Crowley longed for more, yes she wanted to press kisses all along his face until his cheeks were just as red as her eyes. But Azirfell had set boundaries, ones Crowley had agreed to for the safety of each other. It was so long ago since they had revealed how much they cared for each other.

“I just hope someday…” the demon trailed off, looking away from the angel. 

“Me too.”

They finished their meal/coffee in silence. 

**Author's Note:**

> i have a tumblr!! @goodalexomens  
come yell at me about my reverse au if you want :') they make me happy


End file.
